Do you like to rock? How about rolling? No, just the rock? I understand. There are still lots of summer music festivals left in this summer.
July 25-26 – SCHWIMMAPALOOZA (Durham, NC) – Two days of peace, love, and David Schwimmer-related music. One of the Rembrandts will be there along with Rossta Vibrations (Schwimmer-themed reggae), The Davids (Cassidy, Lee Roth, Crosby, and Schwimmer as a vocal quartet), Schwim Shady (just David dressed up like Eminem).
July 31- August 2 – WOODSFEST (Redding, CA) – A three-day festival in the thick woods just outside Redding. Music here is designed to get you better in touch with nature and, as such, will be either quiet or completely silent. Highlights include Foo Fighters sitting still in a tree, Red Hot Chili Peppers lying down next to some ferns, and Maroon 5 being gently attacked by bears.
August 8-9 – ABANDONBAND (Flint, MI) – All the trappings of an outdoor musical festival are available here: mud, parking in mud, getting mud on the water bottle you had to buy, muddy blankets to sit on, food, mud, David Schwimmer, sprained ankles. All except actual bands. Free. Small fee for mud.
August 10-16 – RUSH AND FRIENDS (Hamilton, Ontario) – This week-long festival is one of your last chances to see the band Rush in action. The fellas are set to begin playing on Monday. Guests such as Kansas, Blue Oyster Cult, and Deep Purple are expected to stand off stage waiting for a chance to go on. A chance that will never come. Rush is expected to play as many as three songs over the seven day stretch.
August 22-23 – THAT ONE FESTIVAL (Somewhere, Where Was It) – This band is going to be there, ah, why can’t I remember the name. They have that… guy? You know? A guitar? Other guests include those other guys, that singer lady, the nerdy guy from Friends, the rap people, and someone I’ve never heard of. Might have the date wrong.
August 29-39 – ANISTONAROO (Jacksonville, FL) – Although advertised as a festival of bands based around the perpetually popular Jennifer Aniston, it’s just all the same acts from Schwimmapalooza. They are wearing Rachel wigs but still. Might want to avoid this one.
Okay! Rock on and so forth !
Friends of Wits Doing Stuff
Eugene Mirman (@EugeneMirman) received what he thought was a sketchy $15 parking ticket in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, so he did what any self-respecting person would do: take out a full-page ad in the local newspaper to protest the ticket. (He still paid the fine.)
John Hodgman (@hodgman) offered a stirring video tribute to the erudite political commentary of his retiring Daily Show colleague, “John” Stewart.
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