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Too Beautiful to Live is a daily podcast from Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh. It's about life, current events, pop culture, puttering, laser baldness helmets, and tonight pants.


Episode #2408: Sangria Can’t Melt Steel Beams

June 22, 2017 · Duration: 1:36:32 · Play

A Yale administrator is fired over things she wrote on Yelp, which makes Andrew take another look at his submissions to the site. Plus, a documentary has Luke looking back on his family’s Amway-selling days. And a listener sends in an email that…you know what? Let’s just not talk about that.

Episode #2407: A Ghost Is Bored

June 21, 2017 · Duration: 1:01:20 · Play

Luke and Carey head over to the law offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to share ghost stories and discuss a terrifying bug that makes people allergic to red meat. Also, Luke has a new audio drop that he insists on using, no matter how many times Andrew threatens to quit the show.

Episode #2406: Technological Solutions For Emotional Problems

June 20, 2017 · Duration: 1:21:55 · Play

Luke dazzles us with some details about the creation of Spinal Tap and why the brilliant people behind the film only earned tens of dollars. Plus, what exactly does the TBTL Handbook say about swearing and music on this podcast? And a listener has a pest problem that’s really more of a relationship issue.

Episode #2405: Nothing Cold Can Stay

June 19, 2017 · Duration: 1:27:07 · Play

This show has it all: A TBTL Summer announcement, breaking news about our Senior Bidet Correspondent, a mystery solved by a listener, one of Luke’s predictions coming true, and a Cleveland Browns-related tangent. (Sorry about that last one.)

Episode #2403: Mama Said Shark You Out

June 15, 2017 · Duration: 1:15:25 · Play

Luke tries to listen in on his daughter’s college radio station, only to get a Martha-Shaped surprise. Plus, a segment on The Beatles exposes Andrew’s early love of Phil Collins.

Episode #2402: Teach Me How To Doogie

June 14, 2017 · Duration: 1:04:32 · Play

Things get a little weird (and oddly rappy) on this Wednesday (or possibly Tuesday?) edition of TBTL. Luke and Andrew break down some local radio ads, get the backstory on the fastest man in baseball promotions, and answer the age-old question: How much are those little fast food signs we see on the highway?

Episode #2401: Planting The Seeds Of Pastrami

June 13, 2017 · Duration: 1:06:29 · Play

Luke and Andrew try to adjust to their new lives as ex-road dogs. They discuss Andrew’s (not so?) harrowing airport adventure, a chicken sandwich that will be launched to the edge of space, and a man who is determined to bring pastrami sandwiches to Tuscany, despite all odds.

Episode #2400: TBTL Live In Austin!

June 12, 2017 · Duration: 1:17:44 · Play

Luke and Andrew bring their epic journey to an end with a live show at Stubb’s Barbecue in Austin, Texas, with amazing musical guest Shakey Graves!

Episode #2399: A Gravy Train With Biscuit Wheels

June 9, 2017 · Duration: 57:12 · Play

Luke and Andrew check-in from the Ramble In trailer park in beautiful Marfa, Texas, where Luke is making plans to start a new life. Andrew tries to prepare him by teaching him Texas slang. And, of course, a roadtrip version of Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2398: Naked Networking

June 8, 2017 · Duration: 56:15 · Play

Day 4 of the TBTL-a-Thon finds Luke and Andrew in a trailer park in Albuquerque, New Mexico, celebrating a minor miracle and learning to be careful which bottled water to drink.

Episode #2397: East Of East Vegas

June 7, 2017 · Duration: 1:10:51 · Play

Luke and Andrew made it to Las Vegas. They join the show from a dangerously hot RV on the outskirts of town to talk about their seedy adventures and whether ASMR is a productive way to ask people to donate to the TBTL-a-Thon.

Episode #2396: Keep Pocatello Weird

June 6, 2017 · Duration: 1:12:54 · Play

Luke and Andrew find themselves waking up in Boise, Idaho, where they’ve parked their RV in the back yard of listener Sarah. They discuss the long journey ahead of them on day two of the TBTL-a-Thon roadtrip. They also discuss the best dog in the world and the worst flag in the country.

Episode #2394: You Got Zergged

June 2, 2017 · Duration: 1:14:53 · Play

Luke and Andrew listen to the top 50 theme songs of all time (well, they skip a few.) They also debate the best Price is Right games and the role of pecans in a mixed-nut situation. Plus: MUSIC FOR YOUR WEEKEND!

Episode #2393: Ctrl-Alt-Mouth

June 1, 2017 · Duration: 1:22:43 · Play

What does seeing someone run through an airport say about you, the bystander? Luke and Andrew plumb the depths of this age-old philisophical debate. Plus, Carey Burbank joins the show to share the heart-pounding adventures of the PodPets this weekend. And a baseball mascot finds himself in hot water for a rude gesture.

Episode #2392: Eagle Sore Fall Hard

May 31, 2017 · Duration: 1:02:56 · Play

It’s getting really real, folks. Luke and Andrew spend part of the show wrangling with an RV company over next week’s road trip to Austin. They also discuss the end of “the best kept secret in D.C.”: a password for the Wall Street Journal that thousands of people were using. And a listener is concerned about the ads he’s seeing on Facebook (and what they might mean for his marriage.)

Episode #2391: Nothing Smurf Can Smurf

May 30, 2017 · Duration: 1:12:23 · Play

The big TBTL road trip is now only days away, and Luke and Andrew are getting nervous. Luke has a plan to eat right and get some exercise on the way to Austin. Andrew has a plan to eat beef sticks. Plus: Japanese auto racing announcers go nuts at the Indy 500. And Luke tries to solve the age old mystery: Was Alanis Morrissette really singing about Dave Coulier in that one song?

Episode #2389: The Frenchman’s Gondola

May 26, 2017 · Duration: 1:14:07 · Play

Luke stops by the offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to discuss the parking situation in Wallingford and Luke’s new involvement in a top secret operation. Plus, Music For Your Weekend introduces Andrew to the world of Baltimore Club music.

Episode #2388: My Dogs Are Diet Barq’s-ing

May 25, 2017 · Duration: 1:01:17 · Play

Luke joins Andrew at the studios of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to debate which Gallagher is the best Gallagher – Leo or Ron. Plus, Texans can now hunt pigs from hot air balloons (but that doesn’t make them think they’re better than you.) And Luke and Andrew recount their harrowing MPR almost-disaster.

Episode #2387: Soft Talk After Dark

May 24, 2017 · Duration: 1:09:43 · Play

Luke is back! He and Andrew reminisce on the glory days of computer screensavers (with a little help from the, ahem, Paris Review.) Plus, a longtime TBTL listener gets big props on national TV. And more dazzling deets on the prince of Thailand.

Episode #2385: TBTL-O From The Other Side

May 22, 2017 · Duration: 1:18:42 · Play

Nick Jarin of the NW Nerd Podcast joins the show to talk about a sandwich war raging in Western New York and why thousands of digital rabbits — some with mustaches and bunnies — will never wake up again.