TBTL (Too Beautiful to Live) is a daily weekday podcast from Luke Burbank and co-host/producer Andrew Walsh. It is about life, current events, popular culture, puttering, serial boat ownership, and tonight pants. Hotline: (206) 414-8285


Episode #2365: Scammy Go Likely

April 24, 2017 · Duration: 1:43:59 · Play

Andrew has a mini-meltdown at a fancy fundraiser. Luke spends 12 hours at an unusual underground poker game. And a 12-year old drives 800 miles across dangerous, Australian terrain.

Episode #2364: Pantyhose Are Magic

April 21, 2017 · Duration: 1:31:56 · Play

Public radio’s Barbara Bogaev joins the show to talk about life hacks, lock picking, and how she ended up on a terrorist watch list. Plus, a new TBTL jingle and Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2363: Closer, But Less Classy

April 20, 2017 · Duration: 1:22:29 · Play

Luke and Andrew delve into the strange, 1990’s world of ill-considered musical collaborations, and they imagine Cypress Hill’s writing process. Plus, a man claims a Scottish territory as his own, and the New York Times introduces us to California’s “Night Surfers” (whom, we believe, deserve a quiet night.)

Episode #2362: Business End Of The Ham

April 19, 2017 · Duration: 1:19:36 · Play

The Earth just survived a close encounter with an asteroid, thanks in part to a NASA’s “planetary defense officer.” Meanwhile, Tom Brady skips his scheduled appearance at the White House. And Luke explains why asking a girl on a date is better if she has no idea who you are or that you live across the street from her.

Episode #2361: Apollonia Of Nothing

April 18, 2017 · Duration: 1:22:31 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss how they would spend their time in prison if they were ever thrown in the clink. Plus, another fast food chain is jumping on the Google bandwagon without Google’s help. And we finally get to the bottom of the Burro Rey mystery.

Episode #2360: Forever In Blue Jeans

April 17, 2017 · Duration: 1:54:21 · Play

Luke and Andrew research the proper care of jeans and whether or not you have to wash them after wearing them for months on end, even if your wife asks you to. Plus, we look at the real cost of imaginary New York apartments as presented in your favorite TV shows. And Shia LaBeouf is making art again. Can he save it from the trolls?

Episode #2359: Escape From Alabama Hill

April 14, 2017 · Duration: 1:08:24 · Play

Luke joins Andrew in the studios of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to tell a scary story involving one Rudy Burbank. Plus, TV pranksters are getting sued by the TV stations that invited them on their shows. And this week’s Music For Your Weekend is off…the…hook.

Episode #2358: Wrongfire Of The Vanities

April 13, 2017 · Duration: 1:18:53 · Play

Andrew and his computerized genie friend put Luke to the test in a celebrity guessing game. Plus, Google strikes back against Burger King’s attempt to hijack people’s Home devices. And we learn some dazzling details about Grace Slick, Cher, and Sheena Easton.

Episode #2357: That Jazz Is Really Jazzin’!

April 12, 2017 · Duration: 1:22:46 · Play

A new Burger King (Burro Rey?) commercial purposely activates people’s Google devices. A newspaper is taking flack for reporting on the criminal past of the United Airlines victim. And a listener wants clarification on Luke and Andrew’s rules for cell phone etiquette.

Episode #2355: Never Cry On Your Own Shoulders

April 10, 2017 · Duration: 1:28:06 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss a man who tried to dine-and-dash by jumping into the sea and whether it’s fair to call him an “aspiring rapper.” Plus, an airplane passenger finds out what happens when the airline wants him to give his seat back to them.

Episode #2354: Gronking Through The Streets

April 7, 2017 · Duration: 1:05:58 · Play

Luke tries a nasty-sounding coffee experiment in his hotel room in Portland. Andrew tries to guess how many Big Macs are in his body parts. And a listener finds a way to make the guys sound even more drunk. Plus, Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2353: A Man For Dockers

April 6, 2017 · Duration: 1:24:03 · Play

Luke and Andrew discuss their brief unpleasantness during yesterday’s podcast. Plus, a reasonable explanation of why Shia Labeouf’s new movie has only sold a few tickets. And when internet trolls take on Shia’s anti-Trump art project, they get very, very crafty.

Episode #2352: The Search For Lukle’s Gold

April 5, 2017 · Duration: 1:20:06 · Play

Rudy “The Pod Dog” Burbank has become a therapy pup while Carey is under the weather, so Luke and Andrew discuss when it’s acceptable to let dogs share the couch with humans. Plus, Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi ad created a foreseeable backlash online. Luke and Andrew debate whether the backlash was appropriate.

Episode #2351: Speaking Of Speaking Of Beans

April 4, 2017 · Duration: 1:27:47 · Play

Luke spent hours today trying to make a low-carb hot dog bun. Andrew thinks Luke might have mice inside his computer. They discuss these issues and a report claiming it’s best to stand still on escalators.

Episode #2350: Speaking Of Beans

April 3, 2017 · Duration: 1:58:32 · Play

Luke and Andrew were both looking forward to Mariner’s opening day…until Andrew made a big mistake. Plus, two reporters have two very different takes on some Tyrannosaurus Rex news. And we get a behind-the-scenes perspective from a Starbucks barista who loves her job, but hates making Frappuccinos.

Episode #2349: Any Pork In A Storm

March 31, 2017 · Duration: 1:14:26 · Play

Luke and Andrew learn that they got out of Arizona just in time before a plague of biblical proportions descended on Peoria. Also, Luke disagrees with McDonald’s decision to start using fresh beef, and Bob Dylan says he’ll accept his Nobel Prize. Plus, Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2348: Sky Something And The Something Of Tomorrow

March 30, 2017 · Duration: 1:20:56 · Play

Andrew is back in the offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat, but Luke is still on the road. They reflect back on their time in Arizona and discuss whether or not passengers are obligated to chat with their Lyft drivers. Plus, a coffee company boasts about having the highest levels of caffeine, and listeners chime in with stories of shame eating, disturbing jello recipes, and #YarisLife.

Episode #2347: Don’t Yangle With The Yaris

March 29, 2017 · Duration: 1:06:45 · Play

Andrew takes Luke on a ride around Arizona in his rented Toyota Yaris and tries to explain why he likes it so much…and why he may be in trouble when it’s time to return it. Plus, Luke attempts a “coat hook moment” live on the show.

Episode #2346: Podcast Cowboys

March 28, 2017 · Duration: 1:02:28 · Play

On day two of Luke and Andrew’s spring training adventure, they learn that they broke the rules on day one. They also discuss the theft of a giant coin in Germany worth $4.5 million dollars. And Luke’s gross sound effects brings back loving memories for one listener.

Episode #2343: Mucho Further Northo

March 23, 2017 · Duration: 1:37:10 · Play

Luke overheard a *very* intriguing conversation yesterday involving secret, sexy goings on at a popular chain restaurant. He and Andrew discuss that, as well as one TV producer’s fight against binge watching. Also: Your rice might be killing you. Story at 11.

Episode ##2342: Everything Is Coming Up Mulaney

March 22, 2017 · Duration: 2:08:15 · Play

Andrew’s idea for a Mr. Rogers biopic almost becomes a disaster until Luke saves it. Luke gets a special package in the mail. Andrew is obsessed with a new TV show. And Cheerios makes a mistake in trying to save the bees. Plus, a special Spring edition of No Point Conversion!