Too Beautiful to Live is a daily podcast from Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh. It's about life, current events, pop culture, puttering, laser baldness helmets, and tonight pants.


Episode #2621: Ooo, Expedia!

April 18, 2018 · Duration: 1:12:23 · Play

The New York Post reveals why so many “medium rare” steaks are being served under-cooked,  Family Feud has lost it’s dang mind, and the TBTL listeners catch a secret joke buried in a public radio show that nobody else noticed. 

Episode #2620: Without Further A-Doog

April 17, 2018 · Duration: 1:23:04 · Play

Our friend (and colleague!) Nora McInerny of the Terrible, Thanks For Asking podcast joins us to talk about taking her show on the road this summer. And we finally listen to the Samson & Delilah rap song from the 1980s that Andrew and the Tens of listeners tracked down.

Episode #2619: A Work Of Art

April 16, 2018 · Duration: 1:35:23 · Play

Luke and Andrew pay tribute to Art Bell, who passed away at age 72. And they discuss an actor who absolutely savaged the award ceremony he was presenting an award at. (We know that previous sentence ended in a preposition, and we don’t love it, either.) 

Episode #2618: Kermit The Fraud

April 13, 2018 · Duration: 1:27:29 · Play

Luke has made an important decision regarding his new bitcoin. He and Andrew also check-in on some formal viral sensations to find out what they’re doing these days. Plus, the amazing story of people who bought free first class tickets for live, only to have them taken away by an evil airline. And it’s Friday, so we have some Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2617: Zappto Currency

April 12, 2018 · Duration: 1:20:41 · Play

Luke just bought a bitcoin (or part of one, anyway), so he and Andrew bone-up on their crypto-currency knowledge. Plus, the world’s most famous Donkey Kong player is stripped of his titles. 

Episode #2616: Cat Box Rodeo

April 11, 2018 · Duration: 1:11:38 · Play

Andrew wakes up to find himself in a Ramona Quimby/Woody Woodpecker situation. Luke has a heartwarming, inspirational story from the NBA. And we learn that anyone named Petey is by definition ready to party.

Episode #2615: The Fax Of Life

April 10, 2018 · Duration: 1:27:37 · Play

One of the country’s oldest candy companies may be shutting down, so now people are stocking-up on horrible, chalky candy. Luke and Andrew discuss this, and a guy who was hospitalized over a hot pepper incident. 

Episode #2614: America’s Kids Got Laughing

April 9, 2018 · Duration: 1:19:57 · Play

Andrew and Luke explore the very strange thing that happened during last week’s “Hey Dummies” video. Plus, you probably won’t have to sign your credit card receipts much longer, and Andrew holds a seminar on proper compact disc maintenance. 

Episode #2613: Lindy West: A Passionate Dabbler

April 6, 2018 · Duration: 1:13:33 · Play

TBTL Friendo Lindy West swings by the offices of Walsh, Walsh and Doormat to talk to Luke and Andrew about eagle attacks, celebrity flip-phones, and candy bars. Mostly we talk about candy bars.  

Episode #2612: Delicate But Safe

April 5, 2018 · Duration: 1:25:51 · Play

It took 18 years for a fancy Canadian hotel to forgive a man who created chaos with a suitcase full of pepperoni. Luke and Andrew discuss that, and they make a salad-related bet.

Episode #2611: How Did These Buff Bacharachs Escape My Radar?

April 4, 2018 · Duration: 1:17:18 · Play

Luke and Andrew relive the golden days of Mort, Luke’s erstwhile talent agent. They also revisit some of Shaquille O’Neal’s greatest hip-hop hits, which are really like musical Wikipedia entries that shed light on the former baller’s life. 

Episode #2610: Go Big Or Go To Hawaii

April 3, 2018 · Duration: 1:16:20 · Play

Luke’s nieces, Madi and Mari, join the show to chat about their obsessions with cats and Stranger Things, and Andrew tries to get them to fight over chores. Plus, a new study on relationships confirms something that seems very obvious to Luke.

Episode #2609: Ashokan Means Hello AND Goodbye!

April 2, 2018 · Duration: 1:07:36 · Play

Andrew tests out his new studio and tells Luke all about his big move over the weekend. Meanwhile, Luke survived the great space-junk storm of 2018 (barely), and Andrew wonders if he’s getting grifted on eBay.

Episode #2608: Dig Doug

March 30, 2018 · Duration: 1:06:57 · Play

Luke meets a famous person in the airport, but it doesn’t go as he would have hoped. Meanwhile, Andrew finds common ground with a man sitting in an office chair on the beach. And it’s Friday, so we have some Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2607: The Wind Beneath My Teeth

March 29, 2018 · Duration: 1:12:26 · Play

Comedian and long-time TBTL Friendo Hari Kondabolu joins the show from New York City to talk about his new podcast and the fruits of his fame, including billboards with his face on them, free coffee for life, and an official day named after him! Plus, Luke confesses to some pretty shady behavior in college, and Andrew discovers a new internet toy.

Episode #2606: Tea For The Telemarketer

March 28, 2018 · Duration: 1:20:49 · Play

Andrew contacts eBay to see if anything can be done about his broken heart (and broken Walkman.) Meanwhile, an unexpected phone call leads Luke to the FCC. And Andrew’s got some loose theories on “gas station salad dressing.” 

Episode #2605: Yes Men And The Longi-Dudes

March 27, 2018 · Duration: 1:13:12 · Play

Andrew gets a vintage walkman in the mail and opens it on air, with mixed results. Luke defends Ringo Starr, and both guys try to figure out who the hell bit Beyonce in the face?

Episode #2604: The Smote Detector

March 26, 2018 · Duration: 1:16:08 · Play

Luke goes to extreme measures to protect the Pod Dog from an annoying smoke detector. He’s also convinced that a piece of the Chinese space station is going to land on him. Meanwhile,  Andrew’s big move is underway, but for some reason, he’s fixing up old computers instead of packing boxes. 

Episode #2603: The Men Who Cry At Trees

March 23, 2018 · Duration: 1:17:02 · Play

Luke and Andrew try to better themselves through educational music. They also wonder if TV networks should keep showing children crying during sports broadcasts. And is it Friday? It sure is! We have some Music For Your Weekend. 

Episode #2602: A Boy Named Cthulhu

March 22, 2018 · Duration: 1:46:01 · Play

Luke and Andrew travel a long road trying to figure out the proper pronunciation of “Cthulhu,” admittedly a road they probably shouldn’t have taken. Plus, a popular weather app predicts the end of days, and Luke has discovered a new radio show to obsess over.

Episode #2601: Double Indumbnity

March 21, 2018 · Duration: 1:04:59 · Play

Listeners have been going to great lengths to find Andrew’s mystery Christian Rap song from the 1980s. We get an update on that, and on Luke and Andrew’s attempts to win a radio contest. They also help a listener with a brick problem. Or they don’t help at all, actually. 

Episode #2600: The Buncanny Valley

March 20, 2018 · Duration: 1:12:38 · Play

Luke and Andrew debate whether or not they should enter a public radio contest. Also, Luke thinks Andrew achieved the unachievable on eBay, and we sample some beats from everyone’s least-favorite Christian Rap outfit of the 1980s. 

Episode #2599: Messin’ With Mario

March 19, 2018 · Duration: 1:18:49 · Play

Luke is suffering from a moderate-to-severe case of Brain Cloud, but nonetheless decides to spring a U.S. Geography pop quiz on himself during today’s show.  Andrew’s attempts to buy back his childhood continue with the help of Ebay and an Archie Double Digest. And Ben Affleck’s back tattoo has Luke questioning whether he can still be imaginary friends with Ben Affleck. Oh, also, Luke gets a new nickname. 

Episode #2598: Enough About Me, Let’s Talk About Yousef

March 16, 2018 · Duration: 1:18:23 · Play

Luke makes a new, unlikely friend, but he’s already ruining the relationship. Andrew is very disappointed in a New York Times writer who claimed to “unplug” from electronic news. And it’s a Friday, so there’s Music For Your Weekend!

Episode #2597: Kiki’s Korner

March 15, 2018 · Duration: 1:34:16 · Play

TBTL’s digital producer, Kristina “Don’t Call Me K-Lo” Lopez, joins the show to help us settle on an official TBTL nickname for her. Plus, Andrew and Luke bond over their love of a Seattle party supply store, and they discuss whether having extra room in your home can hurt or help a relationship.